Crack Addict Speaks on Addiction Recovery

Today I interviewed a Nar­conon student with a 23 year crack history. Here is Maggie’s story:

Where were you born and raised?

I am heroin a baby. My mom was a heroin addict and I was born addicted in the Bronx. She brought me to my grandmother’s house when I was six weeks old, stating that she was going shopping.

She never returned and my grand­mother and grandfather raised me. I had a great childhood with my grandparents. I went to Catholic School, did normal kid stuff and had plenty of love.

When did you first begin abusing drugs?

When I was 19 my grand­father died. I had a very difficult time with his death and I started snorting cocaine to try to get rid of the pain. Soon I became addicted.

My life con­sisted of nothing besides work and getting high. Somehow, I managed to work as a dental assistant.

Later, I became a bartend­er. My life consisted of working and spending the money I made on cocaine. For 15 years my life was bartending and hanging out with people who used cocaine.

When I was about 25 I started dating a bouncer at a bar. Our whole relationship was centered on getting high.

One day when he was very high he robbed his friend’s house. A woman walked in and surprised him and he cut her throat. He was sentenced to 12 years in prison.I was pregnant so I married him in prison. I stayed married to him during the 12 years that he was in pris­on and I got pregnant again.

The only time I was not getting high was when I was pregnant. I did not want my kids to be born addicted as I had been. I kept a clean house and got my kids to school but I was not really the mother that they needed because I was high all the time.

Four years ago I started smoking crack cocaine and life really started to go down­hill. My husband (now out of prison) left me because of my addiction and took our daugh­ter with him. During the next four years, I had only one friend – a crack smoker. I con­tinued to do bartending, but started to get high at work. It had gotten to the point where I was high continuously.

How did you get out of this mess?
When I was high I used to go on the computer and look at different rehab centers. I would get depressed when I was coming down from the high and think I wanted treat­ment. I would feel better after a while and would decide that I did not need treatment.

In my internet searches I had come across Narconon, I carried that number around with me for a year.

One night I was living with my boyfriend who caught me with a crack pipe at 5 a.m. He threw me out of the house. He was throwing my clothes in the dumpster and because I had more crack on me, I really did not care. I just wanted to drive away and get high. I lived in my car for two straight days, getting high.